If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize