Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
