summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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