He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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