wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
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