So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
