I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
