I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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