The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
We have so much sex to catch up on
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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