"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
