Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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