it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
You ate ashes out of my bong
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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