Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
