so explain again why im purple
no
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
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