My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
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