Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
