Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
