READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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