Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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