She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize