I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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