OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
