You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
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