question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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