i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
