I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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