Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.

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(407): View more from Florida

wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.

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(678): View more from Georgia

she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy

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(207): View more from Maine

her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did

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(630): View more from Illinois

hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?

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(904): View more from Florida

usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru

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(409): View more from Texas

He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.

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(702): View more from Nevada

If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has

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