So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
