i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize