What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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