actually, I'm a sock model
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
