I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
