i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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