why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
