The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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