Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
