I want to walk on stilts...naked
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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