Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
