Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
