ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize