I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
