Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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