Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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