Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
