I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize