Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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