Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize