Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
