White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
