so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
