And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
How's work?
Spinning.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
