he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
